Have you ever looked back on your marriage and wish you knew exactly where you could have stopped, prevented, or eased the battle between you and your spouse? 

Was there ever situations that were so trapped in a vicious cycle resulting in the same argument, the same spiritual battle that you had no idea how it got so far into the marriage? 

I mean, in marriage “Time” together should mean growth, unity, and wisdom of how to prevent any complaints or problems, right?! 

Well, here is how the enemy becomes clever.

He makes you believe there is no going to back. Once your marriage has had the same battle for six months, ten years, or even over thirty years, it just means that’s how you are. There is no way of change or growth. 

 

But WHOA….. is that a lie if I have ever heard one?! 

 

This post will tell you how turning around, going back to the gate of entry, standing strong, taking back what is yours behind that gate is exactly what you need to do….. And it’s biblical! Yes, His word tells us to go back to the gate, where our marriage entered, unity entered, our insecurities entered, our good and bad entered, and where our new adventures entered and take back what is ours. 

Vision it, breathe it, and receive this word today to turn back to the battle. Meet Him at the gate!

 

Turning back the battle at the gate.

The Lord says,

“He will be strength for those who turn back the battle at the gate” Isa 28:6.

Oh, if only Adam and Eve had turned back the battle at the gate. How different this world might be today.

But before I get too hypercritical I must ask myself how many times I had not turned back the battle at the gate, how many times I had let the enemy tread himself into my marriage when he should not have been able to enter into the gate.

 

Why do we let him have such freedom when he uses it to put us in bondage?

Sadly, for me because I did not know that God created me to turn back the battle at the gate.  

I did not know that when the Lord said he created me to be a helper it meant I could stop the battle at the gate.

It means that I am appointed to do just that.

 

Let us look at this in the word,

 

Now to better understand let’s take a close look at some Hebrew definition for this verse from Strong’s Hebrew Lexicon

• The word Make (H6213 `asah) fashion, accomplish, appoint, ordain
• The word Helper (H5828 `ezer) is one who helps by giving relief, support, assistance, rescue, and comfort
• And the Root word (H5826 `azar) also means to help but the primary idea lies in girding, surrounding, hence defending.
• The word Comparable (H5048 neged) What is conspicuous, what is in front of, before your face, in your view or purpose
• And the root word (H5046 – nagad) To tell, make known, to declare, announce, report, proclaim, acknowledge, confess, messenger (participle)

 

Father make me fashionable

The Lord says He will make (asah) which is to fashion, prepare, ordain and appoint women to be the man’s helper.  

Yes, you and I have been fashioned to be a helper for our husbands.  So women let’s start wearing it well. And, if you are in need of a well-respected designer stop by a few of these address, I can guarantee you will find a quality outfit that will keep your marriage through a lifetime.

1 Peter 3:1-6, Ephesians 5:22-24, 6:10-20, James 3:17-18 and Galatians 5:22-26.

 

In order to accomplish that which we have been appointed and ordained to do, and be for our husbands, for our marriage, we need to become familiar with His WORD.

It is in the reading, studying, meditation and understanding of His WORD that we are able to prosper and be fruitful.  (Psalms 1).

Related Posts:

When your marriage is under Spiritual Attack.

Praying through Spiritual Warfare in your Marriage

Scriptures you should read when facing Spiritual Warfare

 

It is not good that man should be alone

As his wife you are appointed and ordained to give relief, support, assistance and comfort to our husbands and even at times to rescue him. How?

By girding him in prayer, by surrounding him in prayer, hence defending him in prayer.

So it is necessary that we recognize the enemy from afar, from outside of the gate.  

As a wife, we should be aware of the devices the enemy uses to attack our husband, to tempt him, to frustrate him, to make him anxious.  

The Word tells us that the enemy roams to and fro seeking whom he may devour and he’s trying to devour the good godly man that God created.

 

Therefore, we have to be willing to know what frustrates our husband and yet not be frustrated ourselves but be prayerful for him.

We have to be able to look our husband in the face and love him by surrounding him in prayer even during temptations that so easily besets him. We are to help him run his race; our prayers supply him with endurance.

As his wife you are appointed and ordained to give relief, support, assistance and comfort to our husbands and even at times to rescue him. How? Share on X

Powerful and Effective

Yet how can we do this if we really do not know each other? If we are not honest and unrestricted with each other. If we ourselves fall into the entrapment of pride, embarrassment, disappointment.

More importantly how can we do this if we do not know His word. We cannot.  

Our prayers will be like shooting an arrow at a moving target crossing our fingers in hopes of hitting some part of the target.  Know this; our prayers can be powerful and effective

 

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. James 5:16 (NIV)

 

This is how we are supposed to be with one another, man and wife to each other.

 

And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. Gen 2:25

Check out how to become Naked and Unashamed Spiritually with your spouse. #Christianmarraige #unashamed Share on X

Naked and Unashamed

 

So in order to be effectual in this prayer we need to be naked and not ashamed. LOL!!! I’m not talking about the honeymoon days of naked and not ashamed.

I am talking about the challenges that life brings into a marriage. About the challenges that come from being in this imperfect world, being in this flesh. I am talking about the need to be correct to the point of being argumentative and stubborn.  

Those arguments cause strife in a marriage, and that strife, adds division and discord to the marriage and that division and discord will always outlast the argument it will still be there until you humble yourself and confess your sins to one another.

In Psalms 51 David is praying cleanse me from my sin and he says

“Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, And in sin my mother conceived me.” Psalms 51:5

 

David is expressing the revelation that to be born into this world is to have a sin nature.  

 

“We all have sinned and come short of the glory of God” (Rom 3:23).

 

So how does this all come together “we have all sinned”, “the man and his wife were naked and not ashamed”, “pray that you may be healed”. It means that our flaws, our sinful nature, our weaknesses and temptations are to be exposed, visible to each other and we should not be ashamed of one another, disconcerted or disappointed.

 

Let me take a moment to share, let us go back about 35 years. (Now do not think me to old I married young.) My husband and I were newly married still learning each other’s ways and dispositions.

One day I noticed that he was being exceptionally moody and this was not like him.  As I thought about what may have happened to cause his moodiness I realized that this was not the first time this happened and more to the point I realized that he had expressed this moodiness the two years prior at this same time of the year.  I went to him and told him what I thought, he did not respond, we just let it go. A few days later, he came back to me and told me I was correct in what I had noticed. That it is the weeks prior to his birthday that he has feelings of discontentment and rejection because he believes he was from an unwanted pregnancy.  

 

Wow! That was my husband being naked and not ashamed.  

He was willing to be so very honest to put himself out there and identify this most personal and uncomfortable truth about himself. I didn’t realize it then but he was living out the word not only was he being naked and not ashamed but he was being repentant as David was when he spoke

“You desire truth in the inward parts.” Psalms 51:5.

I would like to say that was the last time my husband had those feelings of discontentment and rejection but it would not be so.  

However, he would know that he did not have to be apologetic or ashamed about something that he had already spoken the truth. Moreover, I would come to learn that when this time of the year came around it was and is my responsibility to pray for him. To surround him so much so in prayer that even he would realize he was hedged from the enemy’s lies and deceits of rejection. That I was to declare for him his freedom from these feelings of rejection.

To proclaim for his life Psalms 139

I would like to say that I have faithfully done this but that would not be true.

What I will say is that I have come to learn that it is better to turn back the battle at the gate than to allow the enemy any foot length into my marriage.

 

What I will say is that I am yet learning how to be naked and not ashamed.  That the Lord has put man and woman together to help each other through this imperfect world.  

In addition, if I can be forgiving of those seemingly unforgivable habits that both he and I have, if I can abstain from being disappointed about things that in the end, that literally in the everlasting will not matter then it will be easier to be who the Lord purposed me to be.  

A helper who is not naked and ashamed and who knows how to turn back the battle at the gate.

 

Remember to Be-You-tiful

Veronica B.

Veronica B. is a wife of 35 years. Mother of four children, which of whom she serves in ministry with. She is a lover of His word and an aspired teacher and writer. She desires to touch women of God with the greatest weapon they have. The Bible. You will not find her online or with a blog. Most of her teachings are done alone with the Lord, early in the morning with a pen and notepad. This request of her guest post was given to her by her eldest daughter, Carmen Brown. Knowing Veronica has so much wisdom and knowledge to give; she requested for a study that is often spoken between the two of them….. How to battle in Marriage, even in the good times. How requesting God to give us spiritual eyes in marriage is one of the greatest gifts we can have as a wife.

To learn more about Veronica as a teacher or writer, simply reply in comments.