The bible tells us when man and women join together they become one flesh. (Therefore a man shall leave his mother and father and hold fast to his wife, and become one flesh. Genesis 2:24) There is a transformation that takes place within us that we are no longer one person when marry, but we now have a spouse to serve God with, to minister with, and demonstrate humble godliness to. And just as God intended it to be for His glory, everyone around you will see the transformation take place.
That is not a bad thing. It’s not saying you are no longer an individual but in the contrary; you are you as what God called you to be as a wife. To be in unity with your husband compliments you more as the individual you are more than can imagine. Because your character as an individual shows as you begin to develop as a wife. It shows how strong, patient, wise, and humble you are.
The bible tells us how to be a honoring wife. It teaches us how to love our husbands with His love. That we ought to love our husbands with respect and reverence.
Scripture also tells us that we can win our husbands over by our actions, or we can drive our husbands out of the home. (It is better to live in the corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife. Proverbs 25:24) Did you know our actions in our marriage can do these things and more with the people around us?
We can minister to others about the beauty of marriage or we can cause them to think marriage is hopeless. This is by experience. In my first marriage, I witnessed many other marriages that was going through a divorce at same time as me. It was an rapid time for divorces. I saw no hope in anyone. You could see they had no hope in marriage so why should I?
But when I saw a godly marriage for the first time it gave me hope and it gave me desire to strive for a godly marriage. Their example of grace to one another saved my hopeless thoughts of marriage.
To minister a godly marriage you and your spouse must be in agreement that God is first in your marriage. That you both continuously desire to be in unity in the marriage. When you both are in accordance with this, these 5 ways of how your marriage ministers to others will come naturally because God, who is the center of this unity, will anoint your marriage to speak to singles that is praying for a spouse, to marriages that are striving through hardships, to newlyweds that is learning, and to children that need to be led into example of what marriage is intended to be in Gods eyes.
Here are five ways your marriage will minister to others.
Accepting your Spiritual Gifts –
As you develop a relationship with God you will be able to see yourself more as He sees you. When that happens you see the gifts He has planted within you. As a married couple, the same process will happen. When you come into unity and develop a relationship with God in marriage, you both will see the gifts He has planted within the marriage that will prosper for ministry. As others see your marriage accepting your gifts, it will show a firm foundation of a godly marriage.
As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of Gods varied grace….1Peter 4:10
Prayer in one of the most intimate things you can do in your relationship with God. Praying with your spouse which of whom is the most intimate person you will ever know should be expected in your marriage as a habit. This habit develops closeness. Trust. Authority over martial attacks. It will also rise you both up for the greatness that God has called for you to be.
For where there are two or three gather together in My name, there am I among them. Matthew 18:20
Before meeting my husband, I prayed specifics to God of what I wanted in a husband. Number 1, was that he served God, and number 2, that we would not be ashamed to praise God together.
I had seen so many times, someone would bring who they were dating to church service, and all of sudden they would not praise God that service. If their date didn’t show up the following week, they were back to praising God. It was disappointing.
One day, I saw a young married couple at the altar holding hands with one hand, and lifting their other hand to praise the Lord, I cried to the Lord that day to bless me with a husband to praise the Lord with. That marriage ministered to me that day to see the intimacy of a marriage that was laid on the foundation in God.
In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. Matthew 5:16
Conduct of Speech-
I desire to honor my husband because I know it pleases God. I also know when I honor my husband it’s builds up my husband which essentially builds up my marriage.
One of the most effective ways to honor my husband is how I speak about him and to him. When I speak life to him and about him, it not only affects him but everyone around us. If I tear him down with my words and others hear it, they will do either one of two things. Either think I have no respect for my husband or think of my husband the way I was speaking about him or towards him.
One of the best advice I was given when we married was to not go running to all our friends to tell about that one argument that will soon be forgotten because to the person you ran to, will not forget. They will now see your spouse in the manner you spoke of him. Even long after you both forgive each other over the dispute that is now so minimal.
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29
Submission to One Another–
The bible speaks about wives being submissive to their husbands, and yes this is a calling of a wife. But remember wives, the bible also calls the husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Christ loved the church so much that He died for it. This is a high calling for husbands.
When we love our husbands as God called us to love them with honor and respect and our husbands love us with as much passion as Christ loved the church, then we realize submission is not a duty to tear us down to humility but instead submission is a tool we use to show the beauty of Christ in our lives. Read Ephesians, meditate on it, allow God to greatly move you and your spouse to find the greatness and appreciation of submission in your marriage.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21
How does your marriage minister to others? Do you have a testimony of how a marriage ministered to you and your spouse or how your marriage ministered to others? Share with us, testimonies builds up His people.